Those two words do not look like they belong together. In most people’s lives, change is usually hard and anything but happy. Change is feared because of the loss of control that word in itself holds.
At times, we feel like we are in complete control of our lives. We are in our comfort zone. That place of complete control and happiness. Just when we get comfortable with this season of our lives, something happens. Change.
Unfortunately, as Christians, we know all too well the season of comfort does not last very long. Sometimes the enemy attacks us and we have to fight with all we have to make it out of bed. Other times I feel like God just needs a good laugh. I know from experience that when I look back at seasons of my life that I thought I had under control, God just laughed and laughed.
Some of My Story
After graduating high school, I started college to be an accountant. I had always made good grades in my math classes. My mother had a career as an accountant and enjoyed it (most days). So, that’s what I set out to do with my life. I remember that first day of college. I walked out of my college algebra class realizing that I, in fact, hated math. Like, I really hated math. God laughed.
Fast forward a few years to the time I was working as a secretary for a physical rehabilitation unit for our local hospital. I really enjoyed the organization it required. I enjoyed talking with the patients and their families. I loved helping people, but when I was asked if I would ever consider going to nursing school, I would answer with, “Never”! I had no desire to work the long hours nurses had to work. I definitely did not want to do some of the dirty work they had to do either. The thought of having to learn all the things required to get a nursing license made me cringe. No, I would never be a nurse. God laughed.
Fast forward a few more years, I was still working at the same hospital, only now as an administrative assistant for the cardiac unit. With this job, I was responsible for the unit secretaries training and scheduling. My boss informed me he had hired a new secretary to fill a vacant position on the night shift. This new hire was straight from the Marines. Upon meeting him, my friends hinted that he seemed like a nice guy that I should try to date. I did not find him attractive (at first; thank God he cut his hair!) and could not see myself on a date with this guy. My brother is in the Navy and I didn’t want anything to do with a military man. Again, God laughed.
God laughed as I gave in to his will and went to nursing school.
God laughed as I married that Marine.
I know that today, God’s getting a little chuckle at me writing this.
We’ve had a recurring theme over the past year at our church. That theme has been “God has a Plan”. In our pastor’s sermons, we’ve been challenged to step up and step out to do the work God has called us to do. We’ve been challenged to spread God’s word to all the world. To be the one that stood up and said “Here am I Lord, Send me”. My thoughts, or rather excuses, are many. My job doesn’t allow me to really “share” about my religion. I’m a very busy lady. I have my three children and a husband. My husband and I have a youth ministry at our church. Some might think that since I am a nurse that loves and helps others, or a minister’s wife of a youth ministry that I should be ok in the “share Him with others” category, right? Right? God. Laughed.
My plan, was to share Him through our youth ministry. I would continue to teach on Wednesday nights and build relationships with the kids in our community. I have been working with youth in church since I was in my early 20’s. I have experience with this and know that I’m pretty good with kids.
Doesn’t God just love to laugh at “our” plans?
The Start of My Blog
A few weeks ago our church held a revival. The messages were again about reaching out to the world. I still felt like I was good. These messages must be for someone else. (Cue Laughter from above).
My heart was quickly burdened. When I stand before God in heaven, and place my crown at his feet, would the jewels upon it be many or few? Would he look at me and say, “Eh, You could have done more”.
With a heavy heart, I prayed that He would change my heart. I prayed that I could be bold enough to be like Isaiah. Here am I Lord, send me. Use me. Open the doors that you want opened.
So, here I am. I never thought in a million years that God would lay it on my heart to write to others. To be humble and vulnerable to people that I know, to people that know my past, and to possibly complete strangers. Here I am. I am a sinner. I am a prodigal. I was broken. He redeemed me. He Changed me. He made me happy. He gave me a happy heart. He created all the happy changes in my life.
With all this being said, I hope that you will stick with me, and come back from time to time to see what God has laid upon my heart to share with you. My prayer is to reach just one. To share my story, is to tell of Him. To tell you how I will become Finally Felisha.
In His Love and Laughter